Dating is hard for me. I see the good in people too easily. And I come into every encounter with honest intentions. I try my best to truly get to know someone. To get an understanding who they are, and more importantly, why they are the way that they are. Dating is hard for me because I hate getting disappointed in people. I honestly hate being late down. And it’s only because I try my best not to let people down. But It’s unfortunate because I feel like I get let down so easily.
I’m at a point in my life where I desire a deep connection and understanding of someone. And I yearn for someone to have the same level of desire for me. Dates and stuff are fun. I enjoy them so much. Especially new experiences. But it’s not the dates that I enjoy the most… it’s actually the connection that is built on dates. Having engaging discussions with one another, learning about someone’s childhood to see how it shaped them to their character today. I like watching people. Literally watching them. Their movements, consciously and subconsciously.
This weekend I was supposed to go camping with someone who I've been getting to know recently. I was so excited to go. Camping was something that I had never done before, so of course I was excited for that. But I was more excited about the level of bonding that I was hoping to occur during the experience. Long story short the camping got cancelled due to bad weather and for some reason I got ghosted in our “Plan B” that was to occur. And all I really wanted really was just some quality time. I just wanted a chance to be only in each other's company so that way we could connect more intimately. And I don’t mean sex. I mean just being in each other’s peace and contributing to each other’s peace.
Cuz at the end of day, that’s all I truly desire: Peace.
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